Not-so-non-violent dispute resolution

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Greybeard
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Not-so-non-violent dispute resolution

#1

Post by Greybeard » Sat Mar 17, 2018 9:21 pm

65yo short guy with LTC sat in for a "voluntary refresher" in my last LTC class. He wanted to tell the following story during class, but time was short and I had him save it to tell me later.

He said he was eating solo at a table for two in a very busy restaurant in Carrollton when a very large and tall Afro-American male approached and said "You need to hurry up and and finish eating so my mother and I can have this table." He replied something to the effect that they could have it as soon as he finished his meal and his beer. The big dude went back to the front and got back in the waiting line with his mother. Then returned again within just a very few minutes and said "I am going to have my mother come sit down with you at this table." Small guy replied something to the effect of not recalling inviting the man's mother to come sit with him. At which point the big dude got even closer, hovering, scowling and obviously waiting for a different answer.

Short LTC guy said he then pushed his chair back against crowd of people at adjacent table just far enough to be able to stand up and look the big guy directly in the eye and said something to the effect of "If you think you are going to intimidate me, you are wrong. You know, I MIGHT be an ex Navy Seal. Or .... I could be an off duty police officer. Or ...... I might be a crazy white guy with a gun. I GUARANTEE you that I am ONE of those three people. And I am going to give you just 2 seconds to get away from me before you find out which one of those three I am."

He said the dude did back off and went back to wait in line with his mother. At which point one of the men at the crowded adjacent table leaned over and said "At least two of us here were watching to see how all of that was going to play out. We are both off duty cops and I think you handled that quite well."
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OneGun
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Re: Not-so-non-violent dispute resolution

#2

Post by OneGun » Sat Mar 17, 2018 9:43 pm

Nice story :txflag:
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Re: Not-so-non-violent dispute resolution

#3

Post by Pawpaw » Sat Mar 17, 2018 10:48 pm

"rlol"
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Oldgringo
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Re: Not-so-non-violent dispute resolution

#4

Post by Oldgringo » Sat Mar 17, 2018 11:21 pm

This appears (?) to be another of one of those what would you have done stories:

I might have said, 'Hey Bro, bring her over, I'll be done in a little bit and y'all can have the whole booth'. OTOH, I may have shouted, "man with a gun!" and shot 'em both dead? It depends on where, what time, and when I be, you know what I means?
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:woohoo


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Re: Not-so-non-violent dispute resolution

#5

Post by MaduroBU » Sat Mar 17, 2018 11:48 pm

People in desperate need of a father figure plead for guidance in strange and difficult to interpret ways.


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Re: Not-so-non-violent dispute resolution

#6

Post by treadlightly » Sun Mar 18, 2018 9:38 am

I stopped at a convenience store a few years before I got my CHL. The parking lot was full. I parked at a pump.

Inside, standing in line to get my morning Dr. Pepper--in those well-upholstered times such was my wont--I struck up a conversation with a good friend.

Within a minute, an angry fellow comes busting in and says, "Get your (insert scandalous adjective here) Camaro out of my (similar adjective) way."

I set my can of DP on the counter, begged his pardon, and left. There was still no place to park, so I let it go and continued my peregrinations.

If the same thing happened tomorrow, I'd do the same thing, and without doubt I'd be carrying. I'd just leave.

Turning the other cheek sucks, though. Good to hear a story where it wasn't necessary.

In my tale of spinelessness, I see the angry guy testing fate in traffic from time to time. He's local.

So was my good friend, with whom I was chatting. He's local. I think he has to be a city resident. I think that's one of the rules for being a Municipal Judge.

I've often wondered if they've had a chance to continue the conversation I left. Given the angry fellow's conspicuous driving style, I think there's a good possibility.

I wanted to tell the jerk one should always be sure of an appreciative target when flinging one's poo, but it wasn't my place to educate anyone.


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Re: Not-so-non-violent dispute resolution

#7

Post by WTR » Sun Mar 18, 2018 10:38 am

While I don't agree with the fellows method of telling you to move, I do think it was inappropriate and inconsiderate of you to park a a pump.

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Deltaboy
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Re: Not-so-non-violent dispute resolution

#8

Post by Deltaboy » Sun Mar 18, 2018 10:39 am

Good Story ! Big men have to remember just cause your young Big and Strong, Col Colt made a equalizer that evens the odds. As my Dad told me don't let your mouth write checks that your 6 can't cash.
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Scott B.
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Re: Not-so-non-violent dispute resolution

#9

Post by Scott B. » Sun Mar 18, 2018 10:46 am

Big guy was trying to get a seat for his mother, but lacked the manners to pull it off.

Heck, I'd have invited her over, enjoyed my meal and maybe a bit of conversation while her son stewed in line.
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Re: Not-so-non-violent dispute resolution

#10

Post by RicoTX » Sun Mar 18, 2018 11:12 am

WTR wrote:While I don't agree with the fellows method of telling you to move, I do think it was inappropriate and inconsiderate of you to park a a pump.
I don't agree as long as there was no other place to park and he gets his stuff and leaves. He's a paying customer, same as anyone else. Truth is if he was buying a fountain drink and some snacks they could make more profit off him than someone buying $10 in gas. I see people all the time get gas, then sit in the car for 15 minutes on the phone long after it's through pumping.
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Re: Not-so-non-violent dispute resolution

#11

Post by karder » Mon Mar 19, 2018 1:13 pm

Scott B. wrote:Big guy was trying to get a seat for his mother, but lacked the manners to pull it off.

Heck, I'd have invited her over, enjoyed my meal and maybe a bit of conversation while her son stewed in line.
:tiphat:
It's amazing what a respectful tone and a humble demeanor can accomplish. Big guy might have even made a new friend if he had been polite.
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Grundy1133
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Re: Not-so-non-violent dispute resolution

#12

Post by Grundy1133 » Mon Mar 19, 2018 1:18 pm

i live in a relatively small town so we dont see a lot of rude people or confrontation. just one more reason why im glad to live in a small community..
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Re: Not-so-non-violent dispute resolution

#13

Post by Abraham » Mon Mar 19, 2018 3:27 pm

This story is quite possibly on the level, (and I hope it is) but it has an 'urban legend' feel to it.

If true, bullies rarely change their ways, even when they lose the encounter.

Sociopaths aren't normal and his behavior (if true) isn't going to change.


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Re: Not-so-non-violent dispute resolution

#14

Post by Chemist45 » Mon Mar 19, 2018 7:38 pm

Greybeard,
What would your reply have been if big guy had walked over and said:
"Excuse me sir, my mother and I have been waiting in line for some time and she is a bit unstable on her feet.
I see that you are nearly finished.
Would it be OK if she sat here on tho other side of the table while I maintain our place in line?"


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Re: Not-so-non-violent dispute resolution

#15

Post by Greybeard » Mon Mar 19, 2018 8:27 pm

Chemist - Student's story, not mine. He did say he spoke with the man briefly on the way out and informed him that he would have been glad to let his Mom sit down if the approach had been a little more civil.
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