ScubaSigGuy wrote: PB, tell your story again... I haven't read it.
aaaaaaaaallllll right. everyone else who has read this the other forty seven thousand times it's posted can disregard.
StarDate February '06
anyway. So, I have this associate of mine named The Bass Monster. Now that's Bass, as in Treble and Bass, not Bass Pro Shop. He is known as The Bass Monster, well, because he plays Bass Guitar better than anyone in DallasFt Worth, IMO. I digress. I've known TBM for about 6 years, and consider him one of my goodest friends. yes, I said goodest.
Well TBM has a girlfriend, who at the time was, as we say, with child. Her name is Preggo. She and TBM have decided, in lieu of their decision to conceive, that they should move in together. *shudder* And, of course, they ask for my help, to which I agree.
Now at the time, I was working a 10hr, 4on-3off schedule, and this just happened to fall on my Thursday, before a 3-day weekend, so I figure if things run a little late, no prollem.
I meet TBM at his former residence, to which we load up every last thing he owns, and bookit. We arrive at his future abode, and determine that more hands are required, as we have not taken into account El Preggo's vast array of Worldly Possesions. coming Directly is TBM's associate FrontMan, who is known as such because he is the FrontMan for a popular DFW band, along with FrontMan's little lady. She gets no name. just kidding. I'll call her.... hmmm, BabyMama.
So. We all begin unloading the moving van full of stuff, while piecing together such things as the bed, and TV stand, and what-not. Took a few hours, and being as we didn't start until everyone was off from their respective Day Jobs, it was getting a bit late, about 10pm, well past ya'll's bed time

As we are unloading the last of the Worldly Possesions, we notice a small group of, shall we say, GangBangers, collecting in the parking lot. Being as we are in the Heart of the MetroPlex, I noted their presence, but simply carried on in my tasks. I remember distinctly, "The Big Guy," was wearing a long white T-Shirt, and he stopped, and blew his nose on the inside of his T-Shirt. yeah, I almost ralphed, too. I figured this guy was on coke, as it tends to make your nose run, what with the sniffing of a noxious substance up the pipe. Anyway, there's another of the aforementioned GB's standing near the walkway to The Happy Couple's new apartment, and I remember him wearing a red shirt and matching baseball cap. As I passed him, I said, "Hey man, how's it goin'?" to which he responded with an icy glare. you know, didn't want to humanize his future victims.
I digress. So there we are, all 5 of us, finally done unloading, placing, putting together, and blah bitty blah. so now we're just chillin' in the new apartment, and it's gettin' on around 1030 in the P.M., and I decide, you know fellas, been at work all day, I'ma break out. So, I say my adios, to which TBM says, "Thanks, brother, I'll catch you later." I responded with a witty, "Speaking of brothers, I hope there aren't any out there waiting on me." I'm serious. I said that, moments before what was about to take place. I was kidding, and was only trying to make, yet another bad joke.
Well, I open the front door of the apt, and standing there, is a new GB, with the small collection of other GB's right behind him, about 5 total.
The first thought in my head, and if I'm lyin', I'm dyin', is, "Crap. I hope these guys didn't hear what I just said, cause I'm really not racist and wouldn't want to offend them."
seriously, that was the first thing in my head. funny, huh?
anyway, the lead ScumBag says to me, "C'mon step out here." and begins to raise, what I later determined to be a small .380, KelTec Pistol at me. I backpeddled, and fortunately was still in the doorway, so I was able to dodge behind the front door. Head ScumBag dives forward to prevent me from closing the door, but I manage to get it almost all the way shut, just not completely. Now, I'm leaning against this door, with my back to the door, just ah givin' it all my 230lb frame will give it to keep this thing shut. I'm standing on a tile floor, and my feet are slip slidin' as I'm pressing against the door, what with a few guys pushing from the other side. I have no idea exactly how many people were on the other side of that door. I feel very confidant that there was more than one, but I didn't hang around to count.
At this time, I'm dead-heated in a tug of war for possesion of the door, for what felt like forever. In all actuality, it was probably a minute, but I for some reason
could not muster the voice to call for help from my friends, who were 10 feet away, in the next room. funny, huh?
I finally muster up the nerve to seek out TBM's name, and he comes in to the living room, see's me struggling at the door, exclaims an expletive and retreats back in the bedroom to tell the ladies to get down. FrontMan comes into the room and at a dead run shoulder blocks the door. We later learned that because of the force of our collective energy, we bent the door! So there we are, two guys pushing on the door, TBM taking care of the ladies, when I notice that ScumBag numero uno has his leg in the door, and this is what is preventing us from closing the door.
TBM comes back into the living room, while the ladies dial 911, and I tell TBM to "Kick his leg!!!!" TBM complies with a solid front kick to ScumBag's ankle, to which ScumBag decides he's done foolin' around.
He fires off a round through the door, and continues struggling with the door. We later interpretted that the round went through the door, about a foot over my head (remember I'm squatted down, with my back to the door), and imbedded itself in the wall across the room. there was a big black handprint on our side of the door, just below the bullet hole, from where Frontman's dirty hand had been. Dude came 1cm away from losing a finger!
At this point, TBM plants another thunderous kick to Scumbag's leg, to which the GB's hit the door one final time. This dislodges ScumBag's leg from the door/frame vice, and in the moment the door is open a little ways, ScumBag sticks his hand in the doorway, and fires off another round directly in the apt.
I am here to tell ya, a .380 fired off in yer apt living room is loud enough to make yer ears ring for two solid days. I have seen Metallica, Iron Maiden, Motley Crue, and various other hard rock/heavy metal bands live and in concert, and my ears were done ringing the day after a good show.
Anyway, the final gunshot is about a foot away from TBM and goes directly into the fireplace, harmlessly away from all living things.
At this point the GB's hauled posterior, and were gone. FrontMan and I get the door close, finally, and continue to secure it for a short time. I checked the peephole for combatants, and seeing the coast was clear, we opened the door, reshut it and then threw the deadbolt. You see, when we got the door closed that last time, the deadbolt was out, and kept the door from fully shutting. Dang thing was prolly like that the whole time, preventing me from ever getting the door shut, despite all my persistance.
anyway, to make a long story long, TheFuzz showed, locked and loaded, cleared the scene, took fingerprints, collected two shell casings (how I learned it was a .380), and even stood guard while we turned right around and moved The Happy couple's Worldly Possesions back out of the apt.
A pregnant lady saying emphatically, "I AM NOT STAYING HERE." is quite persuasive!
Anyway, nothing but gratitude and respect for the DPD, in their role in the whole ordeal.
We got everything loaded back out, and THC stayed with TheFrontMan and the BabyMama until a new domicile could be attained.
Why, Mr Jelly, did you not bust a cap in them foo's? Well, My only handgun at that time was my Beretta 92 I had been given the previous year's Christmas as a range gun, to learn how to shoot. I didn't have a CHL, and certainly didn't qualify as travelling.
After smoking a full pack of cigarettes, I went home from the ordeal, most importantly alive. But WE, as a team, had held off a pack of wild animals, kept them from looting us, and I have no doubt that if they had gotten in to the apt, they would have killed us, and raped the women.
the next day I bought a S&W Sigma series 9VE from a pawn shop, and signed up for a CHL class. I was done playin' games, folks.
and that's basically the end of my story, hope is wasn't too boring and long winded!!!!
Q's and critiques I will gleefully answer.