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Re: Thinking about Proposing

Posted: Sat Jan 04, 2014 3:49 pm
by JALLEN
"If you don't know jewelry, know the jeweler." -- Warren Buffett

Re: Thinking about Proposing

Posted: Sun Jan 05, 2014 9:59 pm
by LikesShinyThings
Depending on how she would take it, you could propose to her without a ring on hand, and take her shopping for a ring. That way, you know she'll be happy with it.

Ok, my husband never actually proposed to me at all. One day, we just started looking for rings. Of course, that was after a discussion that went something like, (him) "I can buy you a ring now, using my grad student salary (not much). Or, we can wait until I have a real job and can afford a nicer ring. Which do you prefer?"

But I very much appreciated having input on what ring I would be wearing for the rest of my life.

I'm a bit of an odd bird in some ways, though. This all fit my personality perfectly. If you are preparing to propose, you should have a good feel for how your lady would respond to something like this.
LST

ETA: BTW - I told him I didn't need a diamond. A sapphire would be fine with me. HE is the one who insisted I deserved and needed a diamond. And yes, he's continued to treat me just as well ever since then.

Re: Thinking about Proposing

Posted: Sun Jan 05, 2014 10:05 pm
by SewTexas
Mine didn't "propose" either....
we were at a mall, picking out some things for him to wear to start his new job....walked past the jewelry store, he walked in, we walked out with a ring...."oh, I guess we're getting married" he says...."are we?" says I...."aren't we?" he says...."I don't know, I haven't been asked"...."no, you haven't"he says with a wink....we got married in July, he asked 15 mins before I walked down the aisle :biggrinjester:

Re: Thinking about Proposing

Posted: Sun Jan 05, 2014 11:33 pm
by Divided Attention
I have been married to the same amazing guy for over 25 years. He still has not "proposed" We had a talk about getting married someday after dating for over 4 years, looked at rings - he too insisted I had to have a "real" diamond. He carried the ring for a while until we got to his house one day and he said something to the effect of "Aw - go ahead an put it on"

He did ask my dad permission, but as far as an "Official Proposal" there has been none. I pick on him from time to time, but why knock what is working - I mean he reloads my ammo and buys me rose gripped Colt snubbies for Valentines day!

Re: Thinking about Proposing

Posted: Mon Jan 06, 2014 12:07 am
by SewTexas
Divided Attention wrote:I have been married to the same amazing guy for over 25 years. He still has not "proposed" We had a talk about getting married someday after dating for over 4 years, looked at rings - he too insisted I had to have a "real" diamond. He carried the ring for a while until we got to his house one day and he said something to the effect of "Aw - go ahead an put it on"

He did ask my dad permission, but as far as an "Official Proposal" there has been none. I pick on him from time to time, but why knock what is working - I mean he reloads my ammo and buys me rose gripped Colt snubbies for Valentines day!

that's the way I figure it, if it works why knock it....
and by asked, I mean, mine sent a card by way of the best man, who waited for an answer and said "you'd better say yes, I am dressed in a tux", I said "well, I am dressed up, I guess we'd better do this"

Re: Thinking about Proposing

Posted: Mon Jan 06, 2014 1:14 am
by Oldgringo
I'll see y'alls and raise you one.

Mrs. Oldgringo met my Friday afternoon flight in Pensacola upon my return from a job visit in south Florida. She looked really Florida nice. I asked her, 'what's up, you don't come to the airport'. She allowed as how, 'she was too old to live like this'. I said 'okay'. We got in our respective vehicles, drove into town to the courthouse and got married. We both had rings from previous marriages. We got in our respective vehicles and drove out to our house on Innerarity Point and had smoked mullet and boiled shrimp for supper.

That was 30 years and a whole lot of miles and places ago. Although she never asked, my wife, my traveling companion and my best friend of 30 years now has a modest diamond ring.

Re: Thinking about Proposing

Posted: Mon Jan 06, 2014 6:42 pm
by Oldgringo
Russell wrote:My fiance and I used a custom jeweler to create her engagement and wedding band from a piece of paper and ideas that we doodled. It was a great experience and she truly has something remarkable now on her hand. :)

Unless you just really want to buy something from the store and the proposal be a total surprise, consider using a custom jeweler with her, and both of you design something she'll love.
Is the ring mentioned in the prenupt. agreement? :evil2:

Re: Thinking about Proposing

Posted: Mon Jan 06, 2014 9:57 pm
by FishInTx
SewTexas wrote:Mine didn't "propose" either....
we were at a mall, picking out some things for him to wear to start his new job....walked past the jewelry store, he walked in, we walked out with a ring...."oh, I guess we're getting married" he says...."are we?" says I...."aren't we?" he says...."I don't know, I haven't been asked"...."no, you haven't"he says with a wink....we got married in July, he asked 15 mins before I walked down the aisle :biggrinjester:
That's basically what happened to me an the Mrs. I wanted her to pick the ring before I proposed. We were dirt poor at the time and she knew we couldn't afford much but she loved it. She got a bigger nicer one at on our 10th anniversary and then an even bigger and better one the 20th. Got a few years before we hit 30. When Momma's happy, everybody's happy!! :thumbs2:

Re: Thinking about Proposing

Posted: Tue Jan 07, 2014 10:21 am
by The_Busy_Mom
My husband proposed to me with a ring he picked out. 17 years later, I can say it is not the ring I would have picked out for myself. I have always been a sterling silver girl, and my engagement ring was gold. But there was no way I was going to turn him down because of a ring. As someone mentioned before, you marry the person, not the ring. I have been wearing all sterling jewelry, plus my gold ring ever since. About a month ago, I was talking with some girl friends, and found that I could plate my ring to be silver. Call me ECSTATIC!! But it was still kind of hard to bring up the subject - didn't want to seem ungrateful for what I have. But hubs was like, sure!! And then he said something that completely surprised me. He said it was probably about time to upgrade our rings to something a little more substantial. Hit me like a ton of bricks!! I don't necessarily want to upgrade my ring, but now that we are not 19 years old, we can afford better/different/what we want.

So the point is: if you are really sure about what she wants, GO FOR IT!! If you're not sure, then you can still go for it, and she'll still love you the same. And keep it simple now, so that you can have something to build to (if so desired) in the future. I can't tell you how much I've changed over the last 17 years. I wish you both the best - there aren't many marriages lasting these days!!

Oh, and yes, Happy Wife = Happy Life.

:txflag: TBM

Re: Thinking about Proposing

Posted: Tue Jan 07, 2014 10:36 am
by jiannichan
I can say that I am grateful and blessed that my wife doesn't care about how much I make, what our rings looked like or cost. I spent a lot less than a months salary on her engagement ring and the wedding bands together. All she wants us for us to be happy and grow old together with a loving family. I will back up everyone who suggested that pre-marital counseling will do wonders. If you have a church that you go to regularly, you can probably meet with the pastor and have a few sessions. Congrats on your decision to tie the knot. Marriage is a wonderful thing.

Re: Thinking about Proposing

Posted: Tue Jan 07, 2014 4:42 pm
by SewTexas
it's been fun reading about everyones stories :cheers2:

Re: Thinking about Proposing

Posted: Tue Jan 07, 2014 6:20 pm
by LSUTiger
Take some advice from an old married guy, RUN!!! :biggrinjester:

Re: Thinking about Proposing

Posted: Tue Jan 07, 2014 6:49 pm
by Oldgringo
jiannichan wrote: {snip}
Marriage is a wonderful thing.
When it works, it really works BUT when it's over, it is really over. :leaving

Re: Thinking about Proposing

Posted: Tue Jan 07, 2014 9:16 pm
by Texas_Blaze
Blue Nile.
My wife got a new one from there about 1yr ago.

She still has the $300 dollar ring I gave her 15 yrs ago, I was 20, waiting tables & sophomore in college.