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A couple of runners up for the Darwin Award. There are some very amusing quotes in this article. The one at the end about the bingo players is great.

http://www.cnn.com/2008/WORLD/asiapcf/0 ... cnnSTCText


CNN) -- Two masked and machete-wielding men who barged into a club in Sydney, Australia, couldn't have picked a worse night for their robbery -- a monthly meeting of bikers.

About 50 burly bikers fought back with tables and chairs -- pretty much anything that wasn't bolted down. One would-be robber was tied up; the other in the hospital.

Police arrested both.

"These guys were absolutely dumb as bricks," Jerry Vancornewal, leader of the bikers, told CNN Thursday. "I can't believe they saw all the bikes parked up front and they were so stupid that they walked past in."

Vancornewal and his buddies were at the Regents Park Sporting and Community Club in Sydney when the two men wearing ski masks stormed in Wednesday night. They yelled at patrons to drop to the floor as they emptied cash registers at the bar.

Hearing the commotion from an adjacent room, Vancornewal and his pals with the Southern Cross Cruiser motorcycle club stomped through to the bar area to intervene.

"They (the robbers) thought they had the upper advantage with their knives and their machetes," Jim Webb, night supervisor of the club, told CNN. "They didn't expect to run into a bunch of guys carrying chairs and tables."

One of the would-be robbers crashed through a plate-glass door and jumped off a balcony.

"All he had to do was push the button and it automatically opened," Webb quipped.

New South Wales police said they arrested the 20-year-old man a short distance away.

The second man made a break for it through the club's service entrance, but the bikers tackled him near a neighbor's fence.

"We just grabbed him, crash-tackled him to the ground, hogtied him with electrical wire and left him for the cops," Vancornewal said.

Police confirmed in a statement that club patrons subdued the second man until officers arrived, but did not provide additional details. The suspect turned out to be a 16-year-old boy.

Both would-be robbers were charged with attempted armed robbery and "face disguised with intent to commit indictable offense," police said.

A third person, who was waiting in a getaway car, took off when the bikers threw pieces of furniture at him, Webb said. Police have not located him.

The Regents Park Sporting and Community Club is a place where locals come to enjoy drinks and take part in various games: cricket, soccer, lawn bowling. The biking enthusiasts meet there once a month to plan rides and other club activities.

In the last year or so, criminals have struck the club about 10 times, Webb said. And Wednesday night's incident, while unusual, wasn't the most memorable.

"We have these old bingo players and they are really serious about their games," Webb explained. "They do not like to be interrupted."

When robbers barged in one evening and announced that they were holding up the place, the players turned around and testily told them to be quiet.

"They were making it difficult for the players to hear the numbers being called," Webb said.

In the last year or so, criminals have struck the club about 10 times, ...

Life in a gun-free zone.

- Jim

Lodge2004 wrote:"We have these old bingo players and they are really serious about their games," Webb explained. "They do not like to be interrupted."

When robbers barged in one evening and announced that they were holding up the place, the players turned around and testily told them to be quiet.

"They were making it difficult for the players to hear the numbers being called," Webb said.

That's priceless.

Reminds me of 1975, when Juan's Ice house was attempted to be robbed. It was the local police SWAT hangout. If I remember there were 25 bullet holes in the two idiots that tried to rob the joint.. Over a dozen of San Antonio's finest were there off duty...This was on Goliad Road on the the SE side.

Here's one from way back.

May 3, 1969, about midnight, I was out riding around with two of my best friends when one got the bright idea to send a telegram to his girlfriend. She was local, it was just the novelty thing.

So we went into the Western Union office on Capitol, which was only a few blocks from 61 Riesner, HPD headquarters. My buddy was facing the wall writing out his telegram when a guy with a small nickel pistol walked in. I saw the gun and nudged my friends and told them.

By this time, he announced the holdup and forced us to climb over the counter into the back and then he followed. Fortunately, a patrol car came by and noticed this and HPD HQ must have emptied.

My friends, once behind the counter, joined the workers in crawling underneath desks. I found a refrigerator, probably there for employee use, and stood behind it. The BG had grabbed the manager and was trying to force him to get the money.

At this time, the cavalry arrived in platoon strength and started ordering the BG to drop his gun, which they did 3 times. The manager had separated himself somewhat and the shooting started. There were at least 7-8 officers at the front of their group that started shooting. Later, when HPD homicide was cleaning house, I obtained the actual case file. The BG had 31 entrance holes. Some of the officers had been climbed onto the counter and were firing downward, so some shots went into the top of his head, including a .41 magnum.

One of my friends had some shrapnel wounds in his leg from officer ricochets and the manager suffered broken ear drums. My buddy didn't even notice his wounds until hours later when we at HPD homicide giving statements.

But it was definitely an off day for the bad guy.

If you drive by this Western Union office, you will see that the counter now has partitions going to the ceiling. They were installed in 1969 immediately after this incident. I truly don't remember whether my buddy got to send his telegram or not.

Mike1951 wrote:I truly don't remember whether my buddy got to send his telegram or not.

I'm sure it seemed much less pressing.

KBCraig wrote:

Mike1951 wrote:I truly don't remember whether my buddy got to send his telegram or not.

I'm sure it seemed much less pressing.

You would be surprised at what people focus on during a crisis. When I was in high school, one friend accidentally shot another with a rifle while they were looking it over. The friend that was shot supposedly asked the ER nurses to not cut off her underware b/c they were new.

When my dh was in the ambulance after his accident, I heard him telling the paramedic to relay the message that I was to pick the dog up from the groomer's since he wouldn't be able to make it that afternoon. (duh.)

People do funny things during a crisis.