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A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a compass, a slide-rule and a calculator. At a morning press conference, Attorney General Eric Holder said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement.

He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.

'Al-Gebra is a problem for us', the Attorney General said. 'They derive solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values.' They use secret code names like "X" and "Y" and refer to themselves as "unknowns" but we have determined that they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philosopher Isosceles used to say, "There are 3 sides to every triangle."

When asked to comment on the arrest, President Obama said, "If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes." White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the President. It is believed that another Nobel Prize will follow.

LOVE it!!!

Stolen and Facebooked. Maybe I can get a few more liberal friends to de-friend me over this. I love stirring the pot!

Syntyr wrote:Stolen and Facebooked. Maybe I can get a few more liberal friends to de-friend me over this. I love stirring the pot!

Ditto DITTO!

The Annoyed Man wrote:

Syntyr wrote:Stolen and Facebooked. Maybe I can get a few more liberal friends to de-friend me over this. I love stirring the pot!

Ditto DITTO!

Ditto ditto ditto.

I just wt myself. Awesome!

Forewarded to Ms. 7075-T7, who is an Al-gebra teacher.

C-dub wrote:

The Annoyed Man wrote:

Syntyr wrote:Stolen and Facebooked. Maybe I can get a few more liberal friends to de-friend me over this. I love stirring the pot!

Ditto DITTO!

Ditto ditto ditto.

Me too

If he had a slide-ruler why did he need a calculator? An abacus, slide-ruler and calculator all provide the same function.

MeMelYup wrote:If he had a slide-ruler why did he need a calculator? An abacus, slide-ruler and calculator all provide the same function.

I believe the MSM would call that "an arsenal".

MeMelYup wrote:If he had a slide-ruler why did he need a calculator? An abacus, slide-ruler and calculator all provide the same function.

Well, of course they do, but the young guys who write these silly things probably never saw one and have no idea, just about like writing stories about dinosaurs or horseless carriages or something.

JALLEN wrote:A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a compass, a slide-rule and a calculator. At a morning press conference, Attorney General Eric Holder said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement.

He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.

'Al-Gebra is a problem for us', the Attorney General said. 'They derive solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values.' They use secret code names like "X" and "Y" and refer to themselves as "unknowns" but we have determined that they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philosopher Isosceles used to say, "There are 3 sides to every triangle."

When asked to comment on the arrest, President Obama said, "If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes." White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the President. It is believed that another Nobel Prize will follow.

I'll be sending you the bill for a new keyboard and monitor.

MeMelYup wrote:If he had a slide-ruler why did he need a calculator? An abacus, slide-ruler and calculator all provide the same function.

new york reload, maybe?