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I participate in a local club with a common mission of interest. One gentleman, who has health issues, is 67 yo, and participates in virtually all club activities, conveniently overlooks paying his dues of $25 a year. He can afford to go to a club dinner once a week and spend $10-15, doesn't drive so is always bumming rides with compassionate guys, and bemoans how his retirement check doesn't go far enough, as if any of them do. The only benefits he misses by not paying his share is the newsletter and access to the internet news discussions. He laughs at those new computer things. Sorry, 67 isn't too old anymore. I'm beginning to let this bother me perhaps more than it should, but anyone who can go out and eat restaurant meals every week can come up with 2 bucks a week to pay his share. Nobody wants to confront him about it. I'm included there, but it isn't fair to the group which has expenses. He's just one of those people who feels entitled and that's it.

People like this exist everywhere, so I'd live to hear from anyone who has already had to deal with a leach and what you did to either bring him into the group or chase him away.

Simply get him alone and tell him he has two choices. Pay up or get out.

AT 67 I have the privilege of having been at the leading edge of "those new computer things" including installing some of the first networks that became the internet. I don't think I am too old, and although my pension isn't as bug as it should be, I am not by any means destitute, so I find myself wondering at his attitude.

In my opinion it would depend on his attitude and ask myself a few questions..

Does he contribute to the betterment of the group?
Does he have a attitude of entitlement or is he appreciative of the rides/companionship
Is he a veteran/ex military?

These few things would certainly help the determination. I suspect from your title using "freeloader" that questions like this have already come to mind..

With him in attendance, during your next group get together, offer to pay this year's membership fee.

Hey, it's only $25.00 and you'd feel noble if he accepts rather than constantly annoyed.

And, who knows, maybe he'd be shamed into turning you down and pay it himself as he ought to...

What do club officers say about this?

I have known people who grew up during the depression who were so tight with money, they just couldn't bear to part with any. A couple of them were wealthy too, but they just couldn't bring themselves to spend, for worrying where the next meals would come from.

I'm 67 myself, and thankfully have few money worries, but I am mindful that my earning power is diminished going forward, so have a lot more "waste not, want not!" attitude about things than formerly.

Maybe the thing to do is post a list of paid up club members in the newsletter, with a request for everyone to pay. One club I've been in has a roster showing everyone's membership status, when the dues run out etc. which is enclosed in the newsletter about every quarter or so.

Abraham wrote:With him in attendance, during your next group get together, offer to pay this year's membership fee.

Hey, it's only $25.00 and you'd feel noble if he accepts rather than constantly annoyed.

And, who knows, maybe he'd be shamed into turning you down and pay it himself as he ought to...

There you go. Or, you could even have the club vote to benevolently cover his dues.

But if he refuses to accept the offer of help, then maybe someone should suggest that 2.5 dinners out of 52 each year would pay for his dues. Some people just think that the rules don't apply to them, and that the rest of us are suckers.

Abraham wrote:With him in attendance, during your next group get together, offer to pay this year's membership fee.

Hey, it's only $25.00 and you'd feel noble if he accepts rather than constantly annoyed.

And, who knows, maybe he'd be shamed into turning you down and pay it himself as he ought to...

My thoughts exactly. Shoot, if it bothers you that much I'LL pay his dues.

I am involved with a home owners association in an upscale neighborhood. We have annual dues to pay for utilities, etc. The dues are about $100 a year. Out of 36 people, 30 pay. The other 6 don't pay. They can afford it, all of the homes are in the 200k plus level. So, we do the one thing that we can legally do, put a lien on their property. Right now we live in a culture where 1/2 of the population is freeloader. I believe in charity for the needy, but I like to pick my charity. If your freeloader has a legitimate problem I would pass on it. But just because someone was in the military is not one of them. I served 8 years during the VN war and don't want or expect any breaks. I want to pay my fair share and not one penny more. You should have a sit down with your freeloader and find out if there are real problems and you can be charitable if you desire. But when you don't charge someone, someone else has to pay more. As far as computers, at age 70 I am the IT man in my office and build all of the servers that we have. Age does not mean senile.

I had a friend in high school that took invited me to a country club a couple of times with his parents. They had a sign at the entrance of the club/house restaurant listing all members who hadn't paid and how far in arrears they were. There were a few names, 3-4, on it but his dad said before they started doing that they had a big problem with members not paying. He said it only took a couple of months to reduce the list.

Abraham wrote:With him in attendance, during your next group get together, offer to pay this year's membership fee.

Hey, it's only $25.00 and you'd feel noble if he accepts rather than constantly annoyed.

And, who knows, maybe he'd be shamed into turning you down and pay it himself as he ought to...

Perform a random act of kindness and quit worrying about it. You'll be a better man.

Doesn't your club have a Secretary or someone that handles the money, collection and how it is spent? That person should be the one talking to this guy. I know it's only 25.00 but everyone else pays and I bet some are vets too so there is no reason this guy shouldn't. It's not about the money it's about fairness.

If his behavior is not affecting you DIRECTLY, just ignore the idiot and move on...

gdanaher wrote:I participate in a local club with a common mission of interest. One gentleman, who has health issues, is 67 yo, and participates in virtually all club activities, conveniently overlooks paying his dues of $25 a year. He can afford to go to a club dinner once a week and spend $10-15, doesn't drive so is always bumming rides with compassionate guys, and bemoans how his retirement check doesn't go far enough, as if any of them do. The only benefits he misses by not paying his share is the newsletter and access to the internet news discussions. He laughs at those new computer things. Sorry, 67 isn't too old anymore. I'm beginning to let this bother me perhaps more than it should, but anyone who can go out and eat restaurant meals every week can come up with 2 bucks a week to pay his share. Nobody wants to confront him about it. I'm included there, but it isn't fair to the group which has expenses. He's just one of those people who feels entitled and that's it.

People like this exist everywhere, so I'd live to hear from anyone who has already had to deal with a leach and what you did to either bring him into the group or chase him away.

Or...

Perhaps he's just irritated that you're trying to get him to pay 4x the going rate! $2 per week would be $104 per year, not $25.

Well I said 2 bucks a week when I should have said 2 bucks a month which works out to about 25 bucks a year. What we did this year was add a column to the meeting sign in sheet where everyone has to check off if they are a member. That hasn't bothered him at all. Two years ago we pitched in and paid his dues as some have suggested. He didn't say thank you or kiss my rear, so that isn't happening again. He seems to have befriended one retired physician who drives him around but he admits it is getting old. This month the club prez announced the names of the guests at the meeting. His name was called and again he just raised his hand like a rose bowl float queen. Piece of work.