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WWYD- Apologizing to a Neighbor

Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2015 2:32 pm
by steveincowtown
I know this is waayyy off topic, but also know that after visiting this board for many years there is some real wisdom to be found.

I live in a great established neighborhood and even after crossing the border of 40 I am still one of the younger folks. On Halloween we had a few folks over, some of whom we no very well, some of whom are what one would call acquaintances.

One of the couples that was there got into a fight at some point in the evening, which lead to them arguing very loudly in the front yard. It didn't turn physical, but with the wife's hi pitched voice it should sounded like it. I asked them to go ahead and head down the road which resulted in the wife in the car and the husband blocking it...in the street. That part ended fairly quickly, and they both moved down the road shortly thereafter.

So here is the WWYD- I have one set of neighbors that I am 100% certain were woken up by this, and due to the way their property abuts ours, almost certainly saw this foolishness. I feel like I owe them apology, but just not sure how to go about it. We are adults, and I feel pretty odd having to apologize for the juvenile antics of others.

Re: WWYD- Apologizing to a Neighbor

Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2015 2:38 pm
by suthdj
Only 1 way to do it, walk up knock an apologize. If they are decent ppl they will accept it graciously, if not who cares you did what you could and were a good neighbor for it.

Re: WWYD- Apologizing to a Neighbor

Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2015 2:39 pm
by Jago668
Mail them a hand written apology letter. If you are a doctor maybe go ahead and type it out and sign it. =)

Re: WWYD- Apologizing to a Neighbor

Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2015 2:57 pm
by The Wall
I also think you should just go over and apologize. It did happen on your property, and it's always good to keep the peace with neighbors. I would just say, "I'm really sorry about the disturbance the other night. A couple of my friends got into an argument an I had asked them to take it down the road." Then wait for their response and go from there. I'm betting you'll feel better and so will your neighbor.

Re: WWYD- Apologizing to a Neighbor

Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2015 2:58 pm
by Pariah3j
Question - How well do you know this neighbor ? Do you hang out with them socially or is it more a nod politely when mowing your yard and make eye contact type neighbor ?

Me personally, I don't think I would care unless they are good/semi-social friends/acquaintances, and if they are, then next time hanging out(assuming it will be sometime in the near future) would casually mention something like - "Sorry if some of my party goers the other night got a little loud."

I can understand not wanting to piss off the neighbors, but assuming this isn't a normal occurrence, or you don't regularly have loud social gatherings, I don't think I would go out of my way to apologize.

Re: WWYD- Apologizing to a Neighbor

Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2015 3:08 pm
by TXBO
I would take them some cookies and let them know you did your best to get them out of there quickly.

Re: WWYD- Apologizing to a Neighbor

Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2015 3:08 pm
by RPBrown
I think you should go and apologize in person. It would mean so much more to your neighbors to have a personal apology.

Re: WWYD- Apologizing to a Neighbor

Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2015 3:39 pm
by steveincowtown
The Wall wrote: I would just say, "I'm really sorry about the disturbance the other night. A couple of my friends got into an argument an I had asked them to take it down the road." Then wait for their response and go from there. I'm betting you'll feel better and so will your neighbor.
All solid replies, but this sounds like the tactic I will take.
Pariah3j wrote:Question - How well do you know this neighbor ? Do you hang out with them socially or is it more a nod politely when mowing your yard and make eye contact type neighbor ?
Inbetween...We are fence neighbors. Due to trees and the shape of my house there is only about a sliver of my yard that I can see them or that they can see us. I run/walk with the dog every morning and see the wife 90% of the time. See the husband every few weeks. In 10 years I have been in their house half a dozen of times and they about the same in mine. The wife will occasionally text or email Mrs. Steveincowtown or me. We have always been helpful to one another when storms come through or when we have lost power due to snow/ice. I'd rather keep the peace above anything.

Re: WWYD- Apologizing to a Neighbor

Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2015 3:40 pm
by RoyGBiv
+1 for apologizing in person.

Re: WWYD- Apologizing to a Neighbor

Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2015 3:47 pm
by Richbirdhunter
A in person apology is the way I would go.

Re: WWYD- Apologizing to a Neighbor

Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2015 3:59 pm
by Abraham
Good neighbors are a treasure.

A quick, in person apology would be greatly appreciated by me if my neighbor suffered the same experience.

Chances are your neighbors will completely understand as most of us have had a similar experience or been there to witness a similar experience.

Re: WWYD- Apologizing to a Neighbor

Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2015 5:23 pm
by Charles L. Cotton
Richbirdhunter wrote:A in person apology is the way I would go.
I agree with everyone who made this recommendation. It really shows respect on your part and it will go along way towards developing a good relationship.

Chas.

Re: WWYD- Apologizing to a Neighbor

Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2015 7:07 pm
by cheezit
Alway good to make peace in the community.

Re: WWYD- Apologizing to a Neighbor

Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2015 7:36 pm
by RKirkwood
It's always good to talk with your neighbor. Walk over and mention the issue. Explain what happen and if it seems they need an apology offer one. I talk with my neighbor to keep good relations.

Re: WWYD- Apologizing to a Neighbor

Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2015 8:32 pm
by Oldgringo
A personal apology to your neighbor/s.

Next, tell your unruly/drunk guests that their behavior in your house/on your property is not acceptable and that you expect them to personally apologize to all, including your neighbor/s for their behavior.