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Police Calm Millennial Protesters By Handing Out Participation Trophies
Posted: Fri Jan 20, 2017 9:22 pm
by The Annoyed Man
http://babylonbee.com/news/police-calm- ... -trophies/
U.S.—As anti-Trump rallies nationwide turned hostile with widespread reports of violence, looting, vandalism, and death threats against the president-elect and his supporters, police in numerous major cities were able to instill calm and regain control by handing out participation trophies to all millennial protesters who were enraged about losing the election, sources confirmed.
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Seeing how the trophies had an instantaneous calming effect on the millennials and filled them with a sense of fulfillment and achievement, word spread quickly among police departments nationwide, and emergency trophies were procured by the thousands for use at the rallies.
Re: Police Calm Millennial Protesters By Handing Out Participation Trophies
Posted: Fri Jan 20, 2017 9:37 pm
by Mxrdad
I think maybe a box of Kleenex should have accompanied every trophy as well.
Re: Police Calm Millennial Protesters By Handing Out Participation Trophies
Posted: Fri Jan 20, 2017 10:29 pm
by Pawpaw
The Babylon Bee is Your Trysted Source For Christian News Satire
Re: Police Calm Millennial Protesters By Handing Out Participation Trophies
Posted: Sat Jan 21, 2017 1:21 am
by The Annoyed Man
Pawpaw wrote:The Babylon Bee is Your Trysted Source For Christian News Satire
I love the Bee. It's The Onion for Christians.
Re: Police Calm Millennial Protesters By Handing Out Participation Trophies
Posted: Sat Jan 21, 2017 8:30 am
by Excaliber
I heard that stores were selling out of infant pacifiers for the same reason......
Re: Police Calm Millennial Protesters By Handing Out Participation Trophies
Posted: Sat Jan 21, 2017 9:50 am
by mojo84
When satire and fake news is more believable than real "news". I never imagined I'd live to see the day.
Re: Police Calm Millennial Protesters By Handing Out Participation Trophies
Posted: Sat Jan 21, 2017 10:38 am
by bblhd672
I want my "Obama Regime Survivor Trophy"
Re: Police Calm Millennial Protesters By Handing Out Participation Trophies
Posted: Sat Jan 21, 2017 11:30 am
by Sport Coach
If they don't like the trophies maybe they can start handing out medals of freedom instead - cough - Biden. (no disrespect to those who have actually earned them) Or they could even hand out a Nobel Peace Prize - cough - Obama. (no disrespect for those who actually earned one)
Re: Police Calm Millennial Protesters By Handing Out Participation Trophies
Posted: Sun Jan 22, 2017 1:14 pm
by Lambda Force
