A little levity

[Scott B.]

Amidst all the junk happening lately, FedEx managed to entertain me today via a service alert email.

Be warned, there may be service disruptions because of Monday's eclipse....

[apostate]

FedEx is closely monitoring potential effects of the total solar eclipse on Monday, August 21, 2017. Our first priority is the safety and well-being of our team members, and we will implement contingency plans as necessary.

[Jusme]

Yeah, you never know how badly the effect of the sun, being temporarily shaded by the moon, can be, on FedEx employees. That's why the post office listed everything, but eclipses, as things that will not stop them.

[bmwrdr]

Even the die hard global warmists are afraid the solar eclipse may lead to a global cooling. Texas went ahead with an extremely mild summer and even some rain!

[crazy2medic]

NOTICE TO ALL FEDEX EMPLOYEES: On Monday 20th of August there will be a solar eclipse whereby the moon will shade the sun, this will not block the sun in it's entirety!
If you have read your employee handbook you will see at the bottom of page 58 in very fine print that staring at the sun is prohibited activity during you daily work schedule, if you have read subsection c, paragraph 2 you will see that this rule also applies during a solar eclipse! If your found to be staring at the sun during your work day you are subject to disciplinary action up to and including termination as well as loss of you sight!
If you have any questions regarding this company policy please discuss it with your supervisor either before or after your shift!
Have a nice day, management.

[twomillenium]

I wonder if there is a special procedure for extremely thick cloud cover?

[powerboatr]

you folks are cracking me up....THANKS
i have a package expected for next week.....

[spectre]

Notice: After the total eclipse, employees are cautioned not to stare at the sun with their remaining eye.

[Bitter Clinger]

Wait, wait, it gets better. We are in Bowling Green to run the Corvette Museum track. Every single hotel room here is sold out (Bowling Green is in the "path of totality") and gas stations are running out of fuel already. I knew I should have brought more ammo...

[bigtek]

Wait, wait, it gets better. We are in Bowling Green to run the Corvette Museum track. Every single hotel room here is sold out (Bowling Green is in the "path of totality") and gas stations are running out of fuel already. I knew I should have brought more ammo...

How much muzzle flash is there during a total eclipse?

[JustSomeOldGuy]

Perhaps FedEx is concerned because many of their drivers are werewolves?

[Flightmare]

Perhaps there is concern that some of the unions will attempt to say that in a total eclipse, it appears that their constituents worked all day, all night (the actual eclipse), and part of the next day and therefore are entitled to overtime pay? Does start of morning shift to eclipse count as a full day in union hours?

[JakeTheSnake]

I does sound comical. But our infrastructure is in danger of being overwhelmed by the influx of visitors. We were told to expect gas shortages, and to avoid travel.

I's agree, you does!