Good news

[Venus Pax]

Since obtaining my CHL, my biggest disappointment has involved my discussions with other women. Despite being more likely targets of crime than men, the ones I talk to are hesitant, at best, to consider a gun. They often don't want to even consider self-defense at all.

Last week, dh and I went with some relatives to Colorado to ski. As it turns out, some friends from church were there. (This is a new church for us.) We went to a restaurant for dinner and conversation. Somehow, my new hobby of shooting IDPA was brought up by my husband. The other two women at the table found it interesting, so I invited them to go shooting with me. One in particular seemed very eager to go, so we plan to go this weekend. The other seemed a bit hesitant to go to the range, but was interested in my stun gun.

(One of the men took his Glock out to show me when we got in the car too. I don't know that he has a CHL, but apparently he travels with it.)

I was very encouraged by this.

[Wildscar]

Thats a good story. Some times it all depends on the person. I thought my wife would be opposed to the idea of guns in the house. But she is more open to it then I had originally thought. Ever since I came home in a really good mood after my range trip sunday she wants me to take her shooting some time soon.

Just dont get discuraged my those that are so anti-gun that they cant see the sport and hebby side of them.

[longtooth]

Good job. opportunities will come. Grab em.

[NcongruNt]

Some questions for you...

My long-time girlfriend has an irrational fear of guns. "They're scary", as she would say. I have tried a few times to get her out to the range to shed some of the mystery/fear of the unknown, but have so far been unsuccessful. Her sister is the same way, and my only guess can be that her parents never had guns around the house when they were growing up. Her parents don't seem to have this attitude, so I think it's simply the passive absence of firearms growing up, rather than an active "guns are bad" attitude on their part.

I have a good friend who used to own a range/gun shop, and is a good shooting teacher, who has offered to help teach her shoot. She has agreed to come out and shoot with us, but canceled with other things to do the day before we were to go.

Can you give me any advice on ways to help her overcome her irrational fear of guns?

[RPBrown]

Let her read some of the posts by our female members here. Also have her read on http://www.corneredcat.com.

These two things helped my oldest daughter understand and now she has CHL.

The key is not to push, just gently nudge her. Know when to back off.

[sparx]

Good stuff on that site!

Also, another good idea might be to have her over some day when you're cleaning your guns (well, finishing up cleaning your guns actually, as you don't want her to sit around bored to tears until she gets interested). Then, with one of your guns (fully unloaded of course) you can explain that without the cartidge they are nothing more than a hunk of metal and wood (or polymer if that be the case), and there is absolutely NOTHING she can do to make one of them "go off" (short of loading a cartridge first that is).

Hand it to her and let her look it over. She'll probably take it, carefully, like it's an egg (or more than likely a dead rat), but you will finally get it into her hands. When she gives it back, you can open the cylinder or rack the slide and lock it open and show her how to look down the bore to see the rifling using a fingernail to reflect the light from a strong source, explaining what the rifling does to the bullet to improve accuracy. Give the gun back to her so she can see what you're talking about. When she gives it back, explain something else about it and give it back to her again... going over locking the cylinder or inserting a magazine, racking the slide and dry-firing if possible, as well as the various safeties that it may have (and pointing out the only "real" safety is what she has between her ears).

Then, when she's finished looking all she wants (or you're through showing her some of the neat things about the gun... but know when to stop as you want to keep it intersting and fun), put down the gun and pick up a cartridge, briefly showing her the various components of it and again mentioning that there is absolutely no way the gun will fire without one of those loaded, and that they are pretty much safe themselves when handled with reasonable care and a little common sense.

What you're attempting to do is to get her to handle the gun. Let her look at it and inspect it to her hearts content (and with a little nudging, as RPBrown said), all with the assurance that there is no way it can be anything more than hunk of metal and wood/polymer without those cartridges loaded. Before long, she will feel more at ease around the unloaded guns and when it comes time for her to start handling loaded guns, she'll be one step ahead of the game.

Anyway, it's just a thought, but seemed to help quite a lot in getting my wife, who only a year ago was somewhat used to long rifles but not handguns, feeling more at ease around them. She now has a few handguns of her own, won't let me go to the range without her, and as of last week (at her bequest) started cleaning them herself and enjoys it!

Life is good.

[NcongruNt]

Good stuff on that site!

Also, another good idea might be to have her over some day when you're cleaning your guns (well, finishing up cleaning your guns actually, as you don't want her to sit around bored to tears until she gets interested). Then, with one of your guns (fully unloaded of course) you can explain that without the cartidge they are nothing more than a hunk of metal and wood (or polymer if that be the case), and there is absolutely NOTHING she can do to make one of them "go off" (short of loading a cartridge first that is).

Hand it to her and let her look it over. She'll probably take it, carefully, like it's an egg (or more than likely a dead rat), but you will finally get it into her hands. When she gives it back, you can open the cylinder or rack the slide and lock it open and show her how to look down the bore to see the rifling using a fingernail to reflect the light from a strong source, explaining what the rifling does to the bullet to improve accuracy. Give the gun back to her so she can see what you're talking about. When she gives it back, explain something else about it and give it back to her again... going over locking the cylinder or inserting a magazine, racking the slide and dry-firing if possible, as well as the various safeties that it may have (and pointing out the only "real" safety is what she has between her ears).

Then, when she's finished looking all she wants (or you're through showing her some of the neat things about the gun... but know when to stop as you want to keep it intersting and fun), put down the gun and pick up a cartridge, briefly showing her the various components of it and again mentioning that there is absolutely no way the gun will fire without one of those loaded, and that they are pretty much safe themselves when handled with reasonable care and a little common sense.

What you're attempting to do is to get her to handle the gun. Let her look at it and inspect it to her hearts content (and with a little nudging, as RPBrown said), all with the assurance that there is no way it can be anything more than hunk of metal and wood/polymer without those cartridges loaded. Before long, she will feel more at ease around the unloaded guns and when it comes time for her to start handling loaded guns, she'll be one step ahead of the game.

Anyway, it's just a thought, but seemed to help quite a lot in getting my wife, who only a year ago was somewhat used to long rifles but not handguns, feeling more at ease around them. She now has a few handguns of her own, won't let me go to the range without her, and as of last week (at her bequest) started cleaning them herself and enjoys it!

Life is good.

It's a good suggestion, though I think it will take quite a bit for her to get to the point where she handles any of the guns - though I may be wrong. She has been around while I cleaned my guns at her parents' house (and shown them to her family), and has every time been uneasy. I only started shooting in early January of this year, when I bought my two Mosin-Nagant rifles, and only bought my pistol in early February. I think she regards them as dangerous scary toys, as I admit my enthusiasm for my guns has been similar to a new piece of technology (though it is much more than that, in my mind).

One of my problems is a scarcity of private space to show her the guns. She lives at her parents' house at the moment, and I am in the unfortunate position of living at a housing cooperative consisting mainly of college students, with strict organizational rules forbidding firearms on the premises - currently, my guns live in lockboxes in my van. This will change in June when we both move, but she will definitely need to be at least familiar with the proper handling and operation of my guns before that happens.

I do think it is fortunate that I own the gun that I do - an FEG PA63. It is lightweight and easy enough to handle that it will take away a bit of the scariness that might be more prevalent with a larger pistol. The rifles, on the other hand, are quite a bit more to handle, with the distinction of being quite likely to have killed someone in the past; also, she finds the bayonets especially scary. I also have a Marlin model 60 that she knows I bought largely for her benefit for range shooting, but again it's quite a bit more to handle. I think I'll start with the pistol.

I did have an encouraging conversation with her a few weeks ago when she asked the difference and purposes of different kind of ammunition (FMJ, JHP, JSP, etc.) in which she expressed some interest in what I was saying. Baby steps...

[Venus Pax]

It may take awhile. It took over ten years for me to obtain my CHL after my dad purchased a revolver for me for Christmas one year.

If she's scared of the gun, she may need to warm-up to the idea over time.


Keep it going with gentle nudges.