Laws about brandishing

[DoubleB20]

Long time lurker, CHL holder, enjoy this site and recognize some knowledgeable folks on board here. I'll try and keep this short...My divorced daughter, 27, has moved in with a guy, who she (and my wife and I) thought was a good guy, at least he had a steady job. There was talk of marriage, blah, blah. Mom and Dad, conservative, didn't put up much of a fight, what can you really do anyway? Now the guy has totally flipped and has even pulled a gun on her a couple of times. I've told her to get away, she's got to find another place, etc. Yes, we've offered our home, but she doesn't want to go that way - sigh. My question, isn't there a law about pointing a gun at your significant other in your own home? I'm ready for this guy to spend some quality time away from home. Even writing this, it seems incredible, unbelievable. I also wonder where all the good guys are...help please, recommendations.

[Xander]

If nothing else, I'll bet he could be charged with assault.

§ 22.01. ASSAULT. (a) A person commits an offense if the
person:
(1) intentionally, knowingly, or recklessly causes
bodily injury to another, including the person's spouse;
(2) intentionally or knowingly threatens another with
imminent bodily injury, including the person's spouse; or

That is, of course, assuming that she'd be willing to press charges, which sadly enough abuse victims are not.

-Xander

[txinvestigator]

Long time lurker, CHL holder, enjoy this site and recognize some knowledgeable folks on board here. I'll try and keep this short...My divorced daughter, 27, has moved in with a guy, who she (and my wife and I) thought was a good guy, at least he had a steady job. There was talk of marriage, blah, blah. Mom and Dad, conservative, didn't put up much of a fight, what can you really do anyway? Now the guy has totally flipped and has even pulled a gun on her a couple of times. I've told her to get away, she's got to find another place, etc. Yes, we've offered our home, but she doesn't want to go that way - sigh. My question, isn't there a law about pointing a gun at your significant other in your own home? I'm ready for this guy to spend some quality time away from home. Even writing this, it seems incredible, unbelievable. I also wonder where all the good guys are...help please, recommendations.

He could be charged with domestic violence. Your daughter really needs to see the Domestic Violence Unit at the local prosecutors office. That would be the District Attorney in the county in which she lives.

Re: where all the good guys are; I am a father, so I know this is going to hurt to hear and probably make you mad. However, your divorced 27 year old daughter who is shacking up with a guy who pointed a gun at her, yet refuses to leave is choosing her situations. There is something about her personality that causes her to choose men poorly.

I suggest YOU seek the help of a qualified counselor who deals in these issues. The statistics show that your daughter will continue to make these bad decisions unless there is some serious intervention and she gets intensive counseling.

I wish you both the best of luck, and I will pray for higher intervention.

[seamusTX]

Pointing a firearm at a person is deadly conduct:

§ 22.05. DEADLY CONDUCT. (a) A person commits an offense if he recklessly engages in conduct that places another in imminent danger of serious bodily injury.
(b) A person commits an offense if he knowingly discharges a firearm at or in the direction of:
(1) one or more individuals; or
(2) a habitation, building, or vehicle and is reckless as to whether the habitation, building, or vehicle is occupied.
(c) Recklessness and danger are presumed if the actor knowingly pointed a firearm at or in the direction of another whether or not the actor believed the firearm to be loaded.

P.S.: This is a felony.

I don't often give advice, but for the love of all that's good and holy, get her out of there. This kind of behavior never gets better. You can find thousands of accounts online of men who continued to escalate this kind of behavior until it results in injury and death.

I added a prayer for your family.

- Jim

[jbirds1210]

+1 on getting her out of there....I wish you all of the luck in the world with that.

I agree with TXI that pointing a gun at your daughter is a domestic crime and the local police should be notified immediately!

[DoubleB20]

Doesn't make me mad TXI - I appreciate your honesty - that's why I posted here. I fully expected to be counseled myself. I know and she knows it's her decisions that get her into these situations. Sadly, her ex - doesn't pay his child support, which somewhat forces her to "make ends meet" and, unfortunately, most times it's not under the best circumstances. I've personally spent over $15K trying to help her get "re-established" and if it were up to me....well anyway - if you're a father you know what I mean. She's independent, hard-headed and proud and until she decides enough is enough, I'll be on my knees too. Thanks for your prayers - keep 'em coming.

[DMG]

Double:

Not getting the child support is not much of an excuse; if she cannot go to an attorney to file a Motion for Enforcement (used to be called Contempt) the Attorney General's office will do it for free (just takes longer), and it should be made wage withheld. I understand that the "father" may be a derelict, not holding a job, etc., but this is just more evidence of her bad choices in men.

Your daughte MUST get out of that situation, or it is going to end very badly. If not leading toward injury or death, perhaps another child by another bad choice. So far we have not talked about your grandchild(ren); that is not an environment for he/she/them to grow up in.

David G.

[Rokyudai]

I am sorry to hear about your family's situation. Short answer-Yes there are laws that protect an individual from the threats of another but unfortunately the victim must take legal action in the absence of direct LEO presence. It is obvious that for whatever reason, wether his change in personality/behavior is sudden (substance abuse, stress etc..) or a classic sociopath (do you know of any criminal history he may have-domestic violence, DWI/reckless behavior,assualt,stalking etc..) he has duped you and your daughter and has obviously shown a propensity towards violence...even towards those he supposedly cares for. As others have pointed to, domestic situations can quickly become criminal. Your daughter may very well be embarrased by this situation and may even believe that she herself is somehow at fault which is why she does not want to stay with you. She may also believe he is somehow worth redemption and wants to "work it out". In either case the victim sides with the abuser, and often occurence. Finally, she may also be very afraid of his retaliation and wants to keep you out of it. In my opinion, having her contact domestic violence and working in parallel with the police to establish grounds for a restraining order may be needed. (Be aware some states will nullify an order if the victim 'reinitiates' contact with the abuser...if you watch COPS, you will often see a victim call LE for help to remove an abusive individual. Almost always they will be asked of restraining orders. They don't work if you let them back in! (sorry for the rant) You may want to start documenting a time line of occurences of abuse to help justify the need and to help your daughter understand the legitamacy of your concerns. I wish you the best of luck and I too will say a prayer that this will resolve peacefully and without harm.

God bless you

[Nazrat]

DoubleB20,

You have received some good advice in this thread. Have your daughter open a case with her local AG's office immediately. Unfortunately, quality of service can vary based upon the office handling her case.

I am an AAG in the Child Support division. Please have her apply immediately. Our agency is not fast but the price is right. She can get an application off the website or by calling her local office.

Financial independence might help her decision making or it will at least provide the opportunity for better decision making.

Good luck to you and your family.

[Venus Pax]

I'm sorry you're going through this. I can't imagine what you & your wife are going through right now.
Remind her that living with you & your wife is much better on her child than living in this environment. She may not want to get out of the situation for herself, but an appeal on her child's behalf might work better.

I've also sent up a prayer for her that God would work on her heart & she would let Jesus in. He does things the rest of us can't.

[govnor]

As some have said, your daughter would have to press charges and possibly testify in court. That's something that usually doesn't happen in these cases. Of course I don't encourage any illegal behavior, but if it was my daughter I'd go over there with a can of bear mace and a baseball bat and have a little talk.

[srothstein]

I only have one suggestion that has not yet been made. Try to get your daughter to go visit the counselors at the nearest women's shelter. She doesn't have to be willing to file charges or move out yet to go talk to them. They will be happy to talk to her just ebcause she is already a victim of family violence.

They will try to explain to her how the cycle works and how it will always escalate if the victim stays in the situation. They will try to get her to call the police and file charges. But they will also help her even if she does neither of those, hoping to help get her to that point before someone does get hurt.

The other thing they can do is help with the life style and budget counseling she also may need. They can help get her someplace affordable to live and even help get a better job in some cases. She can talk to them on an "outpatient" basis or as a full time client seeking sjelter and they will help either way.

I have found that I can sometimes talk women into this step when they refuse to press charges or leave the house. Usually it will work out in the long run because they have the victims living there so she can see what does happen.

[LedJedi]

+1 to everything posted above.

I would add one last thing, but it's more of a personal decision. I would send buddy boy there an email with the following text.

Texas Penal Code§ 9.33.
DEFENSE OF THIRD PERSON. A person is justified in
using force or deadly force against another to protect a third
person if:
(1) under the circumstances as the actor reasonably
believes them to be, the actor would be justified under Section 9.31
or 9.32 in using force or deadly force to protect himself against
the unlawful force or unlawful deadly force he reasonably believes
to be threatening the third person he seeks to protect; and
(2) the actor reasonably believes that his
intervention is immediately necessary to protect the third person..

Of course that doesn't mean you can pop a cap in him right now, because she's not in immediate danger by the definition of the law, but you don't exactly have to explain that to him.

perhaps a bit too bold in the opinion of some, but as i said before, personal choice.

priority 1 is getting her out of there and him behind bars though. Honestly, even if she won't admit to it or press charges I would go ahead and call the police and have them come out and investigate so there is at least a record of it. Your daughter might be upset with you but I'd rather have an upset daughter rather than the possible alternatives in this situation.

[calvinbr]

Double B,

I am sorry to hear about your family's situation. Short answer-Yes there are laws that protect an individual from the threats, it is called a GLOCK 23 in 40 cal with RANGERS. She was in fear of her life.


Calvin

[txinvestigator]

Double B,

I am sorry to hear about your family's situation. Short answer-Yes there are laws that protect an individual from the threats, it is called a GLOCK 23 in 40 cal with RANGERS. She was in fear of her life.


Calvin

since when is being in fear of your life a justification for deadly force?

***** editorial opinion******comments of bravado and 'I'll tell what I'd do to that sorry no good...." are not going to help this man or his daughter.

Making threats will backfire. Using deadly force when not justified helps no one.